No. No thank you. I’ll pass.

The other day I was chatting with another professional about a potential collaboration...

she listened as I explained all the details and then said to me, “thank you but no, that’s not a good fit for me right now.”

That was it.

The conversation moved on. We had a lovely chat and she didn’t feel the need to apologize or fall all over herself explaining why she declined.

She simply said “no” yet it was a masterclass in healthy communication.

And on the receiving end of her “no,” her clarity and confidence not only inspired me to hold my own boundaries in the future, it also gave me the opportunity to practice hearing “no” with grace and integrity.

What a powerful, simple exchange.

We as women are conditioned to people please and say “yes,” often at our own expense. But with every “yes” comes a “no”— saying yes to a request might mean saying no to time to work on a passion project, get caught up on work, hang out with your loved ones, or just plain rest(yes, we’re allowed to rest!!)

I’m here to remind you that “no” isn’t a dirty word. In fact, “no” is a complete sentence.

Here are a few ways I’ve come up with saying “no” respectfully and without apology:

✨ I appreciate the offer but I I have other commitments

✨ Thank you for thinking of me but I won’t be able to participate this time

✨ I’m not able to do ___ but I can do ____ instead (be careful: only offer up an alternative if it truly feels good to you and not because you feel guilty!)

✨That’s a great idea but it doesn’t fit with my current focus

✨ I’m maxed out right now so I have to say no

I’m willing to bet that the people in your life will appreciate you protecting your time and energy— we’ve all been in situations where we overcommitted and ended up feeling resentful toward the other person/situation, and no one wants to be on the receiving end of those feelings.

Remember: you can say “no” and still be a good person 🤍